Newsweek and Why I’m “Pro-Life with a Heavy Heart”

24 Comment(s)

1. prairie | Apr 8, 2008 | Reply

   I have read both the chapter and the article. As you point out Adam, this subject is complex. A number of years ago, I was teaching childbirth preparation classes and was asked to teach a class for a group of 13-15 year old pregnant girls. Normally I would start by describing how the baby was developing and the changes that would happen to their bodies. I first asked the girls to tell me a little about their situations. They very openly discussed their pregnancies and their reasons for finding themselves in this state. I was flabergasted. Not one had given any thought to the fact that their pregnancies would end in a baby for whom they would be responsible. Their reasons were completely self absorbed, as one might expect of a child this age. They wanted to “one up” a friend; get back at a restrictive parent or as one girl noted, “I just wanted bigger boobs and I heard they got bigger then you got pregnant”.
   None of these girls were considering abortion although I am sure that option had been presented. That didn’t calculate because they weren’t even considering the baby. It was then I realized there weren’t simple (black & white) solutions to this problem.

   A social worker told me it was a common occurance for these gilrs to show up at Children’s Services with their 18-24 month babies wanting now to give them up. The babies were now walking, getting into things, saying NO and “they just weren’t fun anymore.” But now the babies were much less adoptable. Complex problem, you bet!

2. JamesMartin | Apr 10, 2008 | Reply

   Adam, I work for the Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention Coalition of North Carolina. We’ve been talking around the office about doing exactly what you suggest: partnering with the faith community to try to come to some sort of understanding/alliance about how to prevent teen pregnancy and lower abortion rates. Would you be interested in coming to North Carolina and speaking to a group of health providers/educators and members of the faith community about this topic? If you would, I’d love to speak to you about it. My email address is jmartin@appcnc.org and my phone is (919) 226-1880 x107. Let’s talk. Thanks!

3. jcopling | Apr 10, 2008 | Reply

   I’ve been a member of COR for the past four years and as a recovering Southern Baptist and a product of a Missouri Baptist Convention unversity I find Pr. Adam’s insightful and interesting. If one would have an understanding of Christian of history they see that Pr. Adam’s views of that of the SBC in the late 1960’s and early 70’s before being hijacked by the fundamentialist that caused every who could think to leave the SBC

4. ronniec | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   Adam,
   I agree this is a complex issue but here is what bothers me most and I am very open to hearing where I am getting this wrong. I have read the chapter as well as what you have said here in the blog and it appears that you argue from what brings unity and not what the Bible teaches about the sanctity of life.
   I understand also that if we make a choice between the life of the mother and the unborn child that either way we are making the choice to end a life. Is that not God’s territory?
   We can find many stories such as yours that say how thankful people are for not having abortions and we can also find many stories where physicians have said either the mother or child would die and it didn’t happen that way at all.
   I believe that we have to argue, come to the table, dialog based on truth from scripture and not what the majority want.

5. jonibeth | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   Thank you Adam for sitting in the hotseat, and finally telling us where you stand. There have been times in the past when you have spoke about controversial issues and I have left the service wondering, “where does Pastor Adam stand on the topic he just preached about”?..I appreciate your tact and your presentation, but once in a while it’s just nice to know where my pastor stands on an issue! Thank you

6. rafterw | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   Adam, I also appreciate you being open about your stance on this. I also agree that the most important thing is the bible’s direction and this is what should direct each of us. I grew up being pro-life because as a young woman many of us had an “it’s all about me attitude”. My view has changed, especially after becoming a committed Christian and a mother. However, I am also in the medical field, and there are absolutely times where the decision may be made and families should have the right to have a safe and legal means of whatever medical care they choose. There are many stories where a medical decision was made or not made that deeply affected an individual or family, however, that could be said of every medical procedure. It has to be left up to the mother to decide in those rare situations what is the best medical decision - you hope that she is looking to God for guidance to what the decision to be…but I do not think in every situation that God would always choose the baby over the mother, or that the pregnancy is an indication that God has chosen the baby - it is simply not that simple. We should all take a moment to pray that all women/families faced with this situation will have the strength and guidance to follow His path and His will. Our support as fellow Christians should be to pray and love our neighbor, whatever decisions they make in life. It is not for us to judge. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to express our thoughts on this issue as well.

7. susant | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   Thank you for providing your heartfelt feelings on the abortion issue. This issue has been thrown around the political and religious communities for years - unfortunately. I’m in total agreement there should be a middle ground somewhere; however, I do not believe this issue should be a political one. My belief is the woman and her physician should be the ultimate decision makers…..not a politician nor the religious community.

8. mas | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   I appreciate the treatment of this volatile and heartbreaking issue. Abortion would never be a good answer to any troubled pregnancy, but I find myself unable to condemn those who choose it. Why? Not because I don’t know that God loves every child. I have a son who resulted from an unplanned pregnancy when I was 16. I was quickly married, subsequently had two daughters, and divorced 13 years later. He and his two sisters have been a priceless gift in my life. The struggles during their growing-up years seem as nothing compared to the blessing of being their mother. My son is now a loving, giving husband and father of three, and I am so thankful I have him. But, I find myself unable condemn those who choose abortion, because I would consider it an enormous hypocrisy. I have not adopted any children whose parents did not want them. How can we condemn those who choose abortion, decry their inhumanity, or attack their motives when we refuse to participate or assist in the result of an unplanned pregnancy? I have noted that the most outspoken critics of abortion, the headlines grabbing folks, have no adopted children. It’s so easy to condemn it from the armchair, isn’t it? No need to get ruffled, wrinkled, inconvenienced or give up your income to one of those “saved from abortion” children. After all, surely someone, somewhere will take care of them, right? After raising three children, mostly on my own, I know the incredibly hard work and the measure of self-sacrifice required to do it well. But, amongst my friends and acquaintances who have stated they are against abortion, not one has adopted a child. Any child. Among people I know who have adopted a child, they came to the decision because after trying for some time, they were unable to have a child on their own, not because they wanted to save a child, although that was the wonderful result. And, what of those children who are born with significant birth defects or physical/mental handicaps? How many anti-abortionists are lined up to adopt these children when the parents decide they are unable or unwilling to care for them? The problem is a multi-faceted and heartbreaking one, because real babies and real parents are caught in desperate situations. I agree that we should pay much more attention to prevention and education. And, if folks really mean it when they say they are against abortion, it’s time for them to become part of the solution. Thanks for tackling the tough issues and for the opportunity to respond.

9. Sandy | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

   I agree with “rafterw”’s comment that it is not for us to judge. BUT, I don’t know that God calls us to support a behavior that He considers sinful, based on what we believe the Bible teaches. Again, that doesn’t mean that we cannot be empathetic, love, and care for the person that has made a sinful decision. We are, after all, all sinners.

   Having said that, and after reading a few of the other posts on this subject and others throughout the blog, I’d like to address this issue by also bringing up the fact that much of society (and even churches) are teaching and/or allowing acceptance of the concept that if we disagree with a particular behavior (i.e. abortion, homosexuality, pre-marital sex, etc) we are somehow “not capable of seeing the grey” or “capable of complex thinking”, or we “are being hateful”, and we aren’t being “accepting or tolerant of others’ diversity.”

   Jesus is pretty clear about the path to Him being narrow…and just because there are Christians who choose to believe what the Bible says and believe that there are things that are wrong in God’s eyes, does not mean we are not capable of complex thinking. As a matter of fact, it is extremely difficult to have human feelings and temptations that encourage us to do what is wrong in His eyes and want to do right by Him. It is much easier to rationalize the behavior by saying, “It’s normal. Everyone is doing it. People will think I’m judgmental if I say that this is wrong.” I believe that kind of thinking doesn’t take complex thinking skills.

   A Christian who believes the Bible states that a particular behavior is a sin, has to then make a decision as to whether they are going to support God’s Word, or “go with the flow”. I refuse to go with the flow. I have been so blessed by God - I owe Him more than that. There were many who “went with the flow” that Good Friday thousands of years ago.

   It amazes me how quickly our society has accepted behaviors as “normal” when 30-50 yrs. ago, it would have been unheard of. Rarely anyone says anything about the sin of living together or having sex before marriage - unless it’s to young kids. People are now told that homosexuality is “normal.” It seems to me, that the people who just accept that to be right are the ones who are not using complex thinking skills. People think rationalizing abortion to be alright if a woman was raped, if the child wouldn’t be “normal”, or if a young girl doesn’t have the cognitive skills to make a good decision (that’s what got her into that position in the first place - but her parents need to be there, then, and need to step in and do the right thing - not the easiest thing), etc… fails to remember that the Bible makes it clear that God makes the decisions regarding creation and death. Miracles occur all the time. My children are both living proof of that. I am proof of that. The decisions we or others make demand us to make further decisions…and making another sinful decision doesn’t make the first one right. When we find ourselves in difficult places, like Job, we need to lean on Him. We are to accept that we are now in a bad spot - but there is nothing bad that God doesn’t use for His good - in the long run. The whole point is to trust Him to make it ok in the long run. I had an unplanned pregnancy (so much for the rhythm method). My physical (as well as emotional, financial, etc) life was at risk. By my fourth month, I was told I probably wouldn’t make it and nor would my child. He is now attending K-State on a full scholarship (not counting room and board).

   People have NO idea what one can gain from such an experience. I KNOW He is good. I KNOW I can trust Him to pull me out of the worst of times - like when I was later raped. No - I didn’t choose to have a “morning after pill”. If God meant for me to be pregnant - I would be - and then I would have to lean on Him even more to get through it. And, had I died? I would be in heaven right now. My children would know I made that choice because I put my life in His hands and trusted it to be what was best. God does not allow us to be hurt (read Job) any more than He allows. And, He doesn’t allow us to be hurt without looking at what it means for our walk with Him in the long run. What happens on earth is temporary…except for our relationship with Him.

   I am not telling you these things to sound like I know it all - far from it. The more I learn, the more I realize I don’t know. But, I know, God knows it all. He didn’t give us these commandments with “except when…such and such…happens” He knew we would think up rationalizations. If He had wanted an exception to His commandments, He would have let us know.

   The more I struggle, the more I realize God is in control of only what I give Him to be in control of. “Surrender to His will”, are not just words. They are EVERYTHING. It is not for us to question His will. But, we HAVE to be willing to let Him make our bad decision or someone else’s bad decision work out for the good.

   AND, please do not misunderstand me as to “judging” others. I don’t. I’m just sharing with them what God has said and if I didn’t care about their future walk with Him, I wouldn’t bother. If I didn’t think God wanted me to write this right now (when I could be doing taxes, laundry, etc), I wouldn’t take the time to do it. Most Christians who tell it like it is are doing it because of our love for others. I would never want the huge, inhuman, responsibility for judging anyone. But, I do believe God called us to share the Truth. People may not (yet) kill us for sharing it here in the U.S., but we certainly get called plenty of negative things. We are told we can’t think for ourselves, are not capable of seeing the grey (as if we haven’t lived life ourselves and haven’t made our own rationalizations), are being judgmental, and are being “hateful” to others who think differently from us. They say we don’t accept everyone. Let me speak for MANY Christians who have never said anything hateful to anyone - I do not believe God calls us to accept all BEHAVIORS. But, I most certainly, as do many other Christians I know, accept the people as no different than myself - a sinner. As a nurse, I have held women in my arms and cried with them when they shared what their abortion had done to them. I have cared for women who had no regrets about their abortion and they had NO idea how I felt about it…because their care was just like the care I gave another woman. I cared for the ones who were pregnant and addicted to all sorts of things. I treated them with the same care and understanding. I even taught a class that would help care-givers understand and care for them better. In one week, I saw one family choose to end a pregnancy where the baby was formed without a brain stem. It was a painful, raw experience for EVERYONE involved. Across the hall, another family chose to have a C/S, so as not to harm the baby any further and for him not to have pain during childbirth. They were surrounded by their family and friends, praising God and singing worship songs when he was born alive (even though they knew he could not live without a brain stem). We all waited for him to die … but he didn’t. Not that day. Not the next. He actually nursed from his mother’s breasts. We realized by the third day we would have to make arrangements for BOTH of them to go home. As we (the doctors and nurses) dealt with both families the same week, at the same time, it was evident that this baby was loved, that they believed God sent him, and that they believed it was in His hands as to what would happen next. This baby, despite all medical explanations, lived for over a month before he finally died. I knew, then, without a doubt, that God had granted me the privaledge of caring for them because I (and others)needed to remember He created the life and He needed to be the One to take it. There was also no doubt that this baby was a blessing in their lives. They had trusted Him to do that.

   I have prayed with many patients and I have prayed for almost all. I’m not saying this to make myself sound like something short of Mother Theresa. The point is - many of us had many different feelings about our patients’ behaviors, but, as Christian nurses who saw our profession as a ministry, we most certainly accepted all our patients, just like we accept our family members, etc. whose behaviors were not what we agreed with as much as those whose behaviors we did. I could see both sides of almost every situation. I know I have done many things my kids, husband, etc. didn’t agree with either - but they loved and accept me anyway… and thankfully, at times, they cared enough to say something when I was acting sinfully.

   That’s all I’m saying (’sorry it’s taken so long to get to that). If you saw someone doing something that you felt (and that could be because you believe the Bible, because of your own experiences, because you grew up being taught a particular thing, etc) was hurtful to someone, if you at all care, you would tell them what you think and not worry so much about how they might take it as long as you were sincere and caring in how you shared it … . Frankly, when my kids were 3 yrs. old, I didn’t care if they cried when I said, “no, you can’t go outside alone.” Feelings are not the issue. In these cases, our spiritual health is at stake…our relationship with Him. I would hope someone didn’t worry so much about what I thought of them if they noticed I was getting ready to run into a truck with my car…I’d be grateful they took the time to tell me.

   I realize there are some people who call themselves Christians, that are NOT acting in a way that would be respectful to God. I would just pray that anyone who is speaking about these sensitive issues to really examine whether they are being passionate about their own feelings, the other’s behavior or the person’s spiritual walk, and what their motive is in speaking out. There can be no good come from treating people badly in God’s name. Jesus gave us the ultimate commandment to love each other. We need to come together, especially now, and do what is right in God’s eyes. Unfortunately, we are all sinners, so this will never be a perfect walk. But, we all need to pray that we hear His voice and that we do what He asks us to do, in a caring way.

   God created The Commandments to keep us from making mistakes that hurt us and others. He wants more for us…and that takes prayer, discipline, and each other pulling each other up, to make those things He wants for us to happen. I also pray that if someone is not sure about what they are hearing from God, that they pray about it, fervently, and ask to hear His voice … to know, without a doubt, that when they say they believe God is big enough or “kind” enough or whatever…to accept a behavior that He has called a sin, and that it’s ok to accept that behavior without consequence to your or another person’s soul…that you are EXTREMELY sure you are right. If you are not as clear as I am about knowing that it is NOT what God wants for any of us (sinful behavior), then you not share anything until you know for sure. For example, I used to think abortion was wrong unless the woman was raped (and then, I was, and later, I met a Christian woman who was and her life was so blessed by the baby she chose to have, as well as many others), or malformed (and then I experienced the couple’s love previously mentioned, as well as numerous others), or whose life was at stake (and mine was - and I took care of others whose lives were as well). Now, He’s shown me, there is NOTHING we cannot do without God…and He will make it ok in the long run. Trust that. He knows it’s painful to be in certain situations or born with certain handicaps (I use that term loosely). He’s just saying He is and will be there for you. I PROMISE that He ALWAYS follows through.

   As far as legalization goes - we have made so many things illegal…and yet, even Ms. Roe regrets ever having changed the law. I have taken care of plenty of women who, legally, had abortions, yet bled to death, lost their uterus’ (one at 17), and yes, even died of infections. Just because it is legal, does not mean it will definitely be safe.

   I hear many argue that it is the woman’s decision as to what she should do with her body. First of all, it isn’t her body. It is God’s temple. The Holy Spirit resides within that body when a person becomes a Christian. Secondly, just because the baby grows inside the woman, makes it no less also the father’s baby. Why are his “rights” less important than the woman’s? And, ultimately, the conception is one that occurs by God. As far as I know, we do not normally ask how much someone weighed, or where someone resided before we determined if a murder occured. Yet, that’s what the law says - no one has to report a death of a baby if (Kansas actually allows “abortions” to occur in the third trimester) a baby is born without a heartbeat and weighs less than a certain amount. However, if a baby weighs under that amount, but has a heart beat (some will try to breathe, move their limbs, or cry feebly) upon birth, then they are considered to be a live birth. I practiced across from Tiller’s abortion clinic in Wichita for 7 years and we know he ignored those laws. He would simply throw the babies and at times, their parts, in the incinerator…no matter what the law said. But, I side track. Basically, I believe a baby to be a miracle (just ask someone who has seen a birth or a couple unable to get pregnant) and humans do not have the right deciding on whether to kill it or not, just based on how much it weighs or gambling with whether they think it can survive outside the womb. I think people decide whether to consider it a baby dpending on how they feel or think, rather than on whether God says it is or not. When Mary visited Elizabeth, it is written that “John lept in her (Elizabeth’s) womb”. And, there’s that, “Do not kill” thing…. .

   No matter what someone chooses, though, almost all people tend to do the best they can at any given time, given where they are (and on the information they have) at that time. That’s why God does the judging. We cannot assume to know that aspect about someone. But, I do believe that’s why God calls us to treat each other like brothers and sisters. And, I love my sister enough to say when I think she is about to do something that will really hurt her walk with God. I would pray. I would be there for her. But, I would not say, “it’s ok to do it”. I also would not want someone coming to my son and daughter’s school telling them “it’s ok to do it”.

   If they don’t allow Christian perspectives in the school system, then they should not allow anyone else’s morality into the school system either.

   Gosh, I’ve rattled on. It boils down to caring enough for others to intervene if they are about to do something harmful, to do it with sensitivity and care. We may “all” call ourselves Christians - but we are not all alike in our thoughts and behaviors. So, when we look at the extremes, we may have some Christians actually trying to kill Dr. Tiller, and on the other end of the spectrum, we have Christians who would never think of doing something like that! I do believe that there is nothing wrong with being “extreme” when it comes to believing the Bible. I do think it’s wrong to take “extreme” measures like behaving unlike what God would want. I’m actually thinking now it’s important not to consider “grey” as the area we strive for. I do not believe Jesus lived in the grey. He was clear when he let us know what was right from wrong. It was black and white. That does not mean he did not understand why people wanted to live in the grey or why we choose to. And, he wasn’t rude to the people who didn’t believe in Him. He actually said, “Please forgive them, they know not what they do.” But, when he saw a behavior that was sinful (i.e. woman at well - “Go and sin no more” or the temple used as a currency exchange place to cheat people), he said it like it was. The world is grey - many people don’t know right from wrong. The Holy Spirit is like glasses for someone to see clearly as to what is right and what is wrong. It’s just not always easy to do the right thing… ESPECIALLY when Satan is always manipulating and deceiving. If we don’t pull each other up when we see each other fall, then we are not obeying God. We were never told to get down on the ground with each other and “hang out.”

   I just hope, if you ever do meet me and maybe others like me, that you realize we do love people that may not believe like we do…we love enough to risk alienation by society! We care enough to speak out - despite being treated as if we are the ones that are not being caring! It’s really ironic…and sad…that we can’t just see that not agreeing with someone doesn’t mean they automatically hate you, can’t understand where you’re coming from, live in the stone age, can’t think complex thoughts, or are idiots. It just means we are at different places in our journey and it appears that we disagree about what we believe God wants us to do and for some, it just means they don’t really care what God thinks.

   I just know that when Christians fight amongst each other, it hurts God even more than it hurts us, as parents, when we see our children fighting amongst each other. Please just pray about these issues and how we should share our thoughts about them with each other in caring ways.

   Wishing you blessings in His Word,
   Sandy

10. Canopus | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

    In the 1930’s, my grandmother already had two children and was pregnant with twins. Her doctor made the decision that “it’s you or these twins…you’ve got two other children to raise…I’m taking the twins.” Back then I think people in general thought this was OK. In my family no one talked badly about this decision until the 80’s. Suddenly my mother said my grandmother had been wrong! ??? I don’t know if my mother always thought her own mother had been wrong to let the doctor take those twins or if the way people thought in the 80’s changed so much that my mother decided in the 80’s that her mother had been wrong in the 30’s. I think that’s what happened. Some people say today that it never happens that it’s the life of the child or the life of the mother, and thankfully it’s less often nowadays–but it did happen to my grandmother.

    Incidentally, I am one of those who wouldn’t personally have an abortion, (I don’t know what I’d do in my grandmother’s case) so I’m not just trying to make excuses or anything. I think in my grandmother’s day they put a lot of trust in the doctor and the doctor was almost God. That’s probably wrong too. But when the doctor said he was “taking the twins,” I think my grandmother probably thought that God would see things the way the doctor did. It is hard to overestimate the authority the doctor probably had in that time and place. At least today women think of themselves as more of a free moral agent to have a say in the decision.

    About the “morning-after pill.” In the chapter in the book the “morning-after pill” is described accurately, but in this post, it sounds as if the daughter and her parents already knew the daughter was pregnant when they sought the “morning-after pill.” You can’t know you’re pregnant by the 72-hour time window to take the “morning-after pill.” The seventh-grader and her parents must have been seeking the “abortion pill” more like six weeks into a pregnancy, or else they were seeking the true “morning-after pill” hastily (<72 hourse after act) “just in case?”

    Morning-after pill: (also known as emergency contraception) a high dose of birth control pills 72-hour time window after unprotected act. Either causes egg not to be fertlized, or if fertlized, not to implant. (there is much debate as to how it works, but the egg is not implanted yet–it’s only been <72 hours)

    Abortion pill: (RU-486): after you know you are pregnant…probably at least six weeks

    This was correctly distinguished in the book. In the example in this post, it sounds like the two are confused.

    Some today still are dubious about the “morning-after pill” lest it abort an already-fertilized egg, but in any case the “morning-after pill” is not the same as the “abortion pill.” (sorry I keep harping on that but there is so much confusing of the two out there and I think the confusion keeps the true “morning-after pill,” which probably doesn’t cause an abortion, from being more available.) The scenario described in this post seems to be about a girl who already knew she was pregnant and had had time to tell her parents…that couldn’t be the morning-after pill unless the girl and her parents went to the doctor within 72 hours of the act itself? Sorry to make an issue of it but so many people get the “morning-after pill” and the “abortion pill” mixed up. Confusion of the morning-after pill and RU-486 helps keep the true “morning-after pill” (which probably doesn’t cause abortions) from being available. I’ve heard a biology professor call the “morning-after pill” RU-486 (incorrectly.) The “morning-after pill” is just a high dose of birth control pills, taken within 72 hours of the act, and there’s some debate about whether it could actually cause a fertilized egg to fail to implant (the book was accurate.) The person could not possibly know she was pregnant by then.

    I think confusion of these two medications causes people to think there are more women just cavalierly tossing back abortion pills going “tee hee” than there really are.

    I’m with the earlier poster on young girls and women not using protection though. I think a lot of those pregnancies are to cement the relationship, “have someone to love me,” show Mom, etc. not just dating and oops. I’m a female so please don’t think I’m some old-fashioned guy saying that.

    The reason I’m so neurotic about confusion of the morning-after pill and RU-486 is there are pharmacies that won’t dispense the “morning-after pill” (emergency contraception) and in a small town, a woman has only 72 hours to get her prescription back from the pharmacist that wouldn’t fill it, get to another town, and get it filled before she really IS pregnant…thus possibly leading to an abortion that otherwise wouldn’t have happened. Some pharmacists won’t dispense the “morning-after pill” because they believe that causing failure to implant is the same as causing abortion. Therefore, there’s been at least one reported case in a small town where a woman had a hard time getting her prescription back from a pharmacist who wouldn’t fill it, get to a larger town, and take the emergency contraception within the 72-hour window.

    I like your take on emergency contraception in the book. I think the book is accurate.

11. cmohar | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

    One of the many things I admire about Adam is the articluate, compassionate way he seeks the “via media”. Far too many issues are deliberately polarized to such an extent that it’s often impossible to see (and too emotional to seek) the middle way. However, not every issue has a “gray” side.

    Situations presented to justify abortion range from truly heartwrenching (rape and incest) to inconvenient (teenage or unwanted pregnancy) to medically necessary (life of the mother vs. life of the child). While each situation would be enormously difficult to face (particularly in the absence of faith), none alters the sanctity of life. Life is a gift from God - in any form, at any age, or as a result of any conception - and its intrinsic value is not circumstantial.

    Who among us has the moral or God-given authority to judge that a life is worth ending - no matter how painful, tragic, or inconvenient the circumstances surrounding its conception?

    What logic - or teaching of Jesus - implies that ending a life is a rational solution for the social problem of teenage pregnancy, the criminal problem of rape or incest, or a medical problem?

    It seems hypocritical to proclaim “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” in the context of abortion, doesn’t it? If one of the basic tenets of Jesus’ ministry was to love others more than one’s self, what follower of Jesus would chose their own happiness - or even their own life - over that of the unborn? Who would proclaim that they know the good that God can make from bad circumstances?

    And as for the quote from Newsweek “…let both sides agree that the longer a pregnancy progresses, the more morally problematic an abortion becomes…” I am shocked by the lack of intellectual integrity. Since when are morals defined by human size, shape, capacity, or gestational age?

    God’s relationship to - and regard for - life in the womb is clearly stated in Jeremiah 1:5 and Psalms 139:13.

    Before you judge any life worth ending, consider Matthew 7:1-2.

    I whole-heartedly agree that we should do all we can to reduce abortion. But with all brotherly love and respect to Adam, abortion is not a gray issue.

12. Sandy | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

    Thank you, cmohar, for saying what I tried to say about many of the points, but could not do so as effectively and succinctly as you did. After further thought, I would like to add that it is never a good idea to act on feelings without looking at God’s Word and prayerfully meditating on It. If we acted on feelings alone, rather than our commitment to Him and each other, hardly any of us would stay married, or do anything for anybody else we didn’t particularly like. No where, in the Bible, does it tell us to follow Jesus and His teachings only when we felt like it.
    Yet, it seems that so many people put so much more emphasis on “not offending or hurting anyone’s feelings.” If you want to make decisions that way, then you HAVE to consider His feelings as well. And, if you say you are a Christian, I cannot imagine anyone’s feelings being more important than His.

    It really does boil down to what we think this journey we are on (called Life) is all about. It is about serving God and then all others. We can never repay God/Jesus for what They did and do for us…but I sure want to respect Him enough to try. I remember writing a senior high paper entitled, “What is life for? At the time, I wrote about spreading the Gospel and teaching everyone I knew how good He was. Almost 25 years later, I realize it can’t just stop there. It is aso about surrendering our lives and everything about it, to Him. And, we are to share this journey and what we learn, with others to build them up as well. We are not only judged by Him as to how we keep or don’t keep the commandments, but also how we treat and encourage or deceive our brother or sister in their walk.

    In Adam’s book, he suggests and lists a few websites. I’d like to add a few to the list. Please see the following: http://www.priestsforlife.org/images/ and for those wanting more information, in general, about orgaizations trying to suuport Christians in their walk, I’d suggest the AFA (American Family Association) and http://www.onenewsnow.com/ .

    Many blessings,
    Sandy

13. Sandy | Apr 11, 2008 | Reply

    Please forgive me - I just hit “submit” when I wasn’t quite ready… .

    Adam mentioned various websites we could review (in his book). I’d like to add some others:

    http://www.studentsforlife.org/ (the interview where Tiller states he was aware of the “Born Alive Infants Protection Act”) and

    http://www.priestsforlife.org/images/, as well as

    http://www.onenewsnow.com/ and

    http://www.afa.net/ (The American Family Association)

    Blessings,
    Sandy

14. cokey | Apr 12, 2008 | Reply

    Sometimes gray thinking is benificial and even vital and sometimes I wonder if gray thinking veils the truth. Have we been overloaded with statistics, information, and opinions as to overlook the origin?
    How many of us would lay down our lives for our kids? Most of us, I would guess. Or what if a decision not to have an abortion set the standard for mankind and saved 40 million lives though costing our own life, whether in death or sacrifice? Would we do it? Or maybe abstaining from sex would avoid a snowball effect and save 40 million lives, could we do it? Or, would we take such actions for even one life. And what difference is there?
    For a few special circumstances should we compromise the lives of untold millions? Is the real issue self-interst vs self-sacrific? What would Jesus do? I weary of seeing ethics fall victim of mans’ felt-needs. God designed this world with certain laws, one of which is cause and effect, and Gods’ laws will not bend for mans’ ‘wisdom’. We may as well rewrite the Bible. The sanctity of life and the means to produce life will not be negotiated.
    If I seem dogmatic and over-simplistic I apologize. Ultimately we are all guilty before God but He loves us anyway, can I get an AMEN!

15. susj | Apr 12, 2008 | Reply

    I finally feel refreshed to hear that there are people in this congregation that truly look at the sanctity of God’s Word. I believe that Adam should have written a book entitled: “Seeing Black and White in a Grey World.” Our world is sick and so full of politically correct people and I believe it is crying out for help. Jesus certainly was not politically correct and courageous enough to speak the truth even when it was not popular.

    The majority of abortions are performed on young women who get pregnant and are confused and afraid. These abortions are performed on what would have been healthy babies. We, as the body of Christ, need to be addressing the root problem of why a woman places herself in this compromising position in the first place. I was elated to hear that my son heard biblical teaching at Youth Group from Jason Gant. “Pre-marital sex is a sin” It’s about time that someone risks being “politically correct”, preaches the truth from God’s Word and gives our children some tools to help them fight against the Enemy. I am upset that our Senior Pastor has not done the same thing.

    I was a teenager who “went to church” but ended up pregnant. Trust me, my first thought was abortion but praise God, I sought His direction and because of my decision there is a family out there who has a beautiful baby boy. Do you want to talk about my psycholigical state during that pregnancy when I was alone, afraid, confused, isolated from my family? Let’s discuss how often I think of this child that I gave up. Those are consequences that I live with every day but God has used each and every tear that has fallen to grow me into a compassionate and loving person who knows that the consequences of abortion far outweigh my personal pain.

16. Adam | Apr 12, 2008 | Reply

    I’ve only got a moment to respond to a few of these comments - I’ll try to add more later. But I’d like to respond to Sandy and susj regarding preaching about pre-marital sex being a sin. The word “sin” in Greek signifies “missing the mark” - the ideal that God intends for us. I believe any extramarital sex misses the mark for us when it comes to sex - this includes pre-marital sex and extramarital affairs. I have preached on this and will be again in just a few weeks, when we begin a series of sermons on I Corinthians. Your comments are instructive in that they point to the fact that I may not preach on this often enough. I have preached on this topic on numerous occasions.

    Regarding the original question of abortion, thanks Canopus for your correction. In trying to obscure the details a bit so as not to violate confidentiality I was not careful in my use of the terms. You are quite correct about the difference between RU486 and the morning after pill.

    I would reiterate several points from the chapter in my book - first, in the field of ethics there are often situations where two moral “rights” come in conflict with one another. This is the case when the life of a mother is endangered by carrying a pregnancy to term. In those cases most ethicists affirm that the rights of the mother come before the rights of the unborn. It is true this is a small fraction of abortions. In the case of teens becoming pregnant, I share my own story as an example of why teens and their parents should carry the child to term.

    I stand by my contention in the book, which is the primary premise of the chapter, that the current approach many pro-life people take on this issue has been largely ineffective at reducing the number of abortions.

    The current approach to this issue leaves the issue at a stalemate, and one million abortions occurring in the United States annually. I, for one, am willing to work with and look for common ground in order to reduce that number.

    Regarding the idea that the longer a pregnancy progresses the more morally problematic abortion becomes: My point is that this appears to be a place where pro-life and pro-choice may find common ground - a large number of pro-choice advocates do not support late term abortion. So, let’s find ways to reach common ground here. I understand that many pro-life advocates will not see any difference in preventing a fertilized egg from implanting (by means of the morning after pill) and in aborting a fetus that is in the eighth month of development. I do see a difference here.

    I would encourage you who are uncomfortable with the idea of the need for gray to read my book - I think what I’m advocating might make more sense. After the 1960’s where everything seemed gray the pendulum swung to a place where folks were advocating black and white in everything. The pendulum swung too far to the right. The result is a polarized society and more young people who have rejected Christianity. My book is aimed at encouraging us to recognize that there is gray and not everything is black and white.

    This is an important discussion, thank you for participating in it. Adam

17. Dannar | Apr 12, 2008 | Reply

    On this issue Adam seems to have appealed first to reason rather than our experience as humans. Maybe this is because emotional debates on this subject almost always end in anger and complete dismissal of the opposing view by one or both parties, changing nothing – at least for the better. Sandy’s argument appealed to my heart. My heart wishes, like Sandy, that we could all have such faith in God that all adversity becomes blessing. To me this is true faith.Life is harsh and absurd when one has no faith, so my heart goes to Sandy.

    However, I know that Adam constantly seeks the prodigals – like me. When I was an atheist someone telling me I needed faith was like telling me I needed a genie in a lamp. It was Adam’s appeal to my intellect that kept me coming back every week. He got me to question my own arrogance, got me to read the Bible again without my former prejudice. Eventually God (through people at COR) filled a broken window in my soul with light. It changed me completely.

    From that point on I wanted what Sandy (those like her) had – a faith and love “that always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” It is still what I want.

    Nevertheless, it was an appeal to my reason that made me consider faith. I think this is true for many of the 1000’s of others who now go to Church of the Resurrection.Therefore, I thank God for the Adams for reaching out to us prodigals. And I thank God for the Sandys who show us how much our faith can do and become.

    As far as the issue at hand, there is gray and more shades of gray. I don’t know the answer and won’t pretend to. I just believe that these decisions should be made with a great deal of prayer, followed through with a great deal of faith. If one’s decision leaves one with regret, Christ will still be there for the person, and every congregation should be as well.

18. CC | Apr 13, 2008 | Reply

    “A life is a life no matter how small”
    Dr Suess proclaimed it years ago and Hollywood is reiterating it today. With all due respect…where is the grey in this?

    I submit to you that the grey comes from our own uncomfortableness, our own inability to see Christ in circumstances that cause unimaginable pain, our sin in missing the mark of finding the infinite providence that God provides to “have ALL things work for the good.”

    I concur that the pro-life stance of ramming black and white down the throats of any opposition/woman with an unwanted pregnancy and then walking away is not effective. You cannot take away an individual’s coping skill without assisting them in replacing it with a new one. There are organizations who have found the “grey” in how Christians should approach those considering termination of life at any stage. These Crisis Pregnancy Centers, specifically those under the guidance of Focus on the Family, are reaching out to those who are considering doing the one thing that the volunteers and staff members would work tirelessly to prevent. That is showing the love of Christ! These women who come in for help are loved, not judged, educated, not given the easy way out, and shown life (via ultrasound), not death. I am a child born on the very day that Roe vs. Wade was settled in the courts. I am blessed to be the child of a woman who has spent 15 years volunteering in a Crisis Pregnancy Center. I know that each and every life that is saved, each and every woman that is spared the lifelong pain of abortion is celebrated and cherished.

    I believe that God calls us to be steadfast in our beliefs, but compassionate and loving in their presentation. I submit that the “grey” can be found NOT in altering what is right simply to achieve “more right”, but by each Christian loving, caring for, and educating others. If each Pro-life individual presented their beliefs in this manner, in a Christ-like manner, THAT would make a difference.

19. Dannar | Apr 13, 2008 | Reply

    CC

    I agree with you that there is no grayness in what constitutes life. The gray is in how people understand it. I will not use the label pro-choice or pro-life on myself, because people have so stereotyped those labels that they are as useless as cartoon caricatures. Also, these two have been lumped in with victimless “crimes or sins.” I will not state in detail what I feel these are. I don’t need to. We all have the ability to examine for ourselves which sins have a further reaching impact on other humans than the immediate sin and, also, which sins may glorify people to the point that the place of God is diminished. I will choose another controversial “sin” to illustrate:

    Homosexuality, while I may feel it is a sin, I will leave to God to decide, because here on earth it is hard to believe that homosexuals have as much impact on a society of sinners (all of us) than greed, covetousness, backbiting, bearing false witness (not a simple lie, but true false witness, i.e. meant to bring harm to another with a lie), slander, even adultery, etc., etc,. All of these sins can have butterfly effects that slowly erode away at man’s humanity to man. These very common sins can, given time, bring down a society or corrupt it to the point where it is unlivable. Homosexuality, to me, is not one of these “greater sins,” because the impact is on the individual involved, not society. When homosexuals begin banging on our doors for us to bring out our guests so that they can “know” them, I’ll have to admit I was wrong about this. (Sorry. I was raised on too much Mark Twain – it’s a joke.)

    Also, as yet, homosexuals, for the most part (see above), have not come banging door to door demanding that we deny Christ. (Is Richard Dawkins gay?) Anyway, most seem happy to let us worship as we want, as long as we don’t make their lives unbearable for them. In fact, probably many more would seek Christ if they were not made to feel that their sins were any more outrageous than “regular Joe or Jane?” who cuss and nag occasionally, and probably much worse.

    By the way I’m not gay, but I am not pure in all my thoughts. So assuming that gays commit the sins we all do, I am an equal sinner.

    Why I used this example is that homosexuality and abortion are often presented as if they were in some way tied together. They’re not. And I cannot, with conscience, make dry jokes about abortion. It is a serious issue. The question as to whether abortion is right or wrong comes down to the question that everything we believe rests on: What is human life? Are we just a bundle of cells? Or are we a bundle of cells that somehow has a meaning, a purpose, a God that created us for that purpose, a God that does not “play dice with the universe (Einstein-paraphrased)?”

    It is not just a Christian-Islamic-Judaic question. It is question of all religions. In fact “Eastern” religions are often more aggressive in protecting the sanctity of life than “Western.” Certain animals, sometimes all animals are considered sacred. Sometimes plants are included. Some people in India wear veils, not to hide their face, but so they do not inadvertently breathe in an insect and thus add a death to their conscience.

    Now, I could become completely philosophical about life and reduce it to an equation, or several competing equations, but my point should already be clear: The question of what constitutes life will not go away. Furthermore, no scientist in the world can tell us if human life is sacred, let alone when it becomes sacred. In fact, to me it is not a question of “is a fetus sacred?” but “Is humanity reduced more greatly by the death of a fetus than by the death of someone already entangled in all the questions that make life meaningful.”

    I can’t answer this, and it is my belief that no one can. To consider what I mean by this I will take an example that few Americans have to face:

    There is a mother with two children living on an income of $140.00 a year. Her two living children are barely surviving. Would it be a greater sin to bring another child into the world and have three children on the edge of death, or sacrifice the love she has for the unborn child to keep her two “living” children alive.

    This is a question that millions of mothers around the world face every day. Sometimes they are even forced to decide which of their “living” children will live. The mother has no good or right option; she is forced to decide which “wrong” is more right. American mothers also face the same questions, though their reasons for doing “the right thing” may be different. As for what these mothers should do, I will leave the question to all the mothers (and fathers) in the world. I am sure there would be great disagreement, but anyone with any humanity has to feel deeply for the person who, like Job, is stuck in a quandary as to why God would ever put such a curse on them. Yes, Protestants can use birth control. Not all Catholics agree that this even is a solution. Regardless, we are terribly imperfect beings and we make terrible mistakes, and, like David when Nathan confronted him, suddenly realize the enormity of what we have done.

    And sometimes we are simply caught up in the horrible circumstances of life, things we could not have foretold – like many mothers in the Depression Era who might prostitute themselves to feed their children, only to have more unplanned children, and might then leave their babies on doorsteps, or give their beloved children to other people in hope that they would have a better life.

    Anyway, I think I’ve made my point. There is not always a right answer. For many, like Sandy, the answer is complete submission to circumstance and undying faith that God is with her. It seems like a good answer. Others have trouble believing that God would allow these things and make decisions knowing that they will never be sure whether they were right or not, but go on knowing God will not condemn them (as he didn’t condemn Job) for heavyhearted decisions where there seemed to be no right answer. For those who think the decision is always black and white, that in all circumstances parties are equally guilty and deserving of judgment - I think these people have not faced enough suffering – but again I may be underestimating the complexities of being human.

    As to my political stance I think I am pragmatic, though some may call me radical. I believe the question of whether abortion is right or wrong can never be solved in an earthly court. I believe that whether we prohibit all abortions, prohibit those of convenience, or allow each and every one, the question will still remain one that each individual faces. Our system of government is full of gaps and far from perfect, but, unless we want anarchy, it is still a good system for keeping people with hugely diverse views from filling the streets with blood. When I vote I vote for an imperfect man or woman, and I expect what I voted for. Anyone who believes in a Theocracy only needs to look at how the Davidic Kingdom failed almost as quickly as David left the throne. There is a legitimate question as to whether David was even the king that he was expected by God to be.

    Christians have one king and that is Christ. Christ, our king, did not try to overthrow the Roman Government. He did in the end, I suppose, but only long after he had been martyred. Long after, many good people were put to death in His Name. And then people were even put to death by Christ’s name – How much worse a betrayal than those who simply mocked Him.

    Democracy is better, maybe, but far from perfect. We still have to appeal to God on the important things. There are so many questions mankind is incapable of making. God is with or in each and every one of us (whatever faith or non-faith), and we can appeal to that part of ourselves and others that is greater than we can ever be.

    “Do to others what you would have them do to you, for this is the some of the law and the prophets.”

    To me, 1,000,000 abortions a year says something about how much we value life, even our own lives, and this is a sad thing. People need God - not forced down their throats, but recognized in their own being. Christians and non-Christians alike in this country are far from treating one another justly. Repeated injustices break the spirit of people, and when the spirit is broken God seems less likely. Every person that is driven away when we Christians step up onto God’s throne diminishes God. I am “pro-life.” How could anyone be anything else? But first we must help other’s know that our God is their God, and he is patiently waiting on all of us. When people recognize the Spirit of God in themselves, they will better know right from wrong, and how to right wrongs, and eventually even to accept that all is not perfect.

    But God can, did, and somehow does reside with us, even in this frightening chaos unparalleled in the history of man. Knowing this, we can rise above apathy and …let “thy Kingdom come, on earth as it is in Heaven.” Earth may never be close to perfect, but that is our calling.
    But we can’t piece together God’s kingdom – a window and fireplace, saving the foundation for later. We have to build the foundation so that it is solid and worthy enough to support the Kingdom. The doors and windows will fall into place.

    I am not preaching, for I know I am not worthy of asking anything of anyone. If you meant me, you’d agree:-) I have no time for judging others; I need it all to work on myself. Nevertheless, I believe all this. If I did not, I’m not sure life would be worth living.

    But it is! Alleluia!

    Your hope is my hope.
    Pray for me, and I’ll pray for you
    to survive this imperfect world
    with imperfect understanding
    until I know and you know
    even as we are fully known…

    Alleluia!

20. CC | Apr 13, 2008 | Reply

    Dannar
    Thank you for your reply and your willingness discuss what you believe.
    In regards to the rightness or wrongness of abortion. I do not find any Biblical support for “grey”, likewise I do not find any Biblical “grey” in how Christ dealt with sinners. Simply put, “LOVE the person, hate the sin.” He loved with a perfect love, one capable of showing the error of the sin but always conveying the love for the individual. I believe that some Christians fail at this kind of love in regards to both the issues of abortion and homosexuality.
    I respectfully submit to you that we have a fundamental difference in our view of sin and of human life. I believe that sin, any sin either done privately in our conscience our public, separates us from a perfect God. There is no continuum, no severity equation that the eternally perfect God uses to evaluate our sin. Again I take a simple approach, “Sin is sin.” I believe that human life is sacred from the moment of conception as it is the only life “made in the image of God.”
    In response to the impoverished or prostituted mothers that you have described, I contend that while as miserable as those sitauions might be, the choice to sin as a means of alleviating pain and suffering, even to avoid death, is still indeed a sin. While both of these situations represent unthinkable tradgedy, they also represent opportunity for the body of Christ to be reaching out, nurturing, feeding, loving; opportunity to be Christ-like.
    I am simple in my faith and prayerfully humble in my defense of it.
    Blessings,
    CC

21. Dannar | Apr 14, 2008 | Reply

    CC

    As you said, we obviously have some fundamental differences in our understanding of scriptures, perhaps even in the way that scriptures are meant to be interpreted. However, as far as I can tell, we agree as to the nature of Christ, and, as for other things, I offer only my opinion. I am well aware that my understanding is and always will be flawed by being mortal and imperfect. I alluded to this in my closing salutation, i.e. 1 Corinthians 13. I will repeat it more fully so that you understand that I am well aware of the limits of my understanding in this life:

    Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known (1 Corinthians 13:12).

    As for sin, I am well aware of my shortcomings. To say otherwise would be adding a lie to my list of sins. And I also hate my sins, and if I couldn’t turn to Christ for mercy I would hate my life as well. Also, admittedly, I am very careful in judging others, because, as I am sure you know, Christ makes us ask ourselves over and over in different ways: If we do not forgive other, why should we expect forgiveness from him?

    God Bless you CC, and thank you for cautioning me in a Christ-like manner.

    All the best to you and your’s,

22. Michael | Apr 16, 2008 | Reply

    Adam - Thank you for your thoughtful consideration on this subject. I have read the article, the chapter from the book, the comments on the article, and the comments on this post (whew). First, the comments in both instances illustrate more eloquently than any words the issue that you address. The discussion becomes polarized very quickly.
    My Mother often said, “An idea is not responsible for the person who has it”. Although I agree completely that the pro-life contingent has done an awful job at dealing with the problem that they rail against, at the heart of their argument is a truth (put too simply): life is sacred, and God gets to decide who lives and who dies. I also would like to see the number of abortions reduced, and I also agree that the methods being used by both sides are ineffective. I agree completely with a call to find a means for discussion so that together the two sides can save unborn lives. However, this should not be at the cost of what many Christians understand to be the truth. In other words, we can continue to work toward a solution to save lives, while at the same time holding true to our beliefs.
    Finally, I do not call myself “pro-life” because I see too many of that ilk that are simply “pro-birth”. If you really want to call yourself “pro-life”, then in addition to opposing abortion you should oppose the death penalty, oppose illegal, immoral, preemptive wars, and support programs that take care of the least in our society - the programs that feed, house, educate, train, heal, and insure those who are in need. To fight for their birth and then abandon them for life is no way to treat God’s children.

23. Canopus | Apr 16, 2008 | Reply

    Someone said: “We, as the body of Christ, need to be addressing the root problem of why a woman places herself in this compromising position in the first place”

    I agree! Let’s do! As a woman I think I can bring some new light to this subject (not sure.)

    I think some teen pregnancies are emotionally driven… a need for “someone to love me” or a need to “feel grown up.” Again I do not have scientific evidence on this. Also to “cement the relationship.” I am very sorry and I know it’s not popular to say so but I have heard young girls say exactly that. I truly think the young girls think the guy is going to stick around. If we could open their heads and pour in the facts about how many of the young guys stick around, that might help. More livable wage jobs for the young fathers who do stick around would also help. I think a certain percentage of these emotionally-driven first babies would be hard to prevent. Of course, we are not talking about abortion here because the girl does not want to abort this baby who was wanted (at least by the mother.) In these cases maybe the girl’s parents push her to an abortion. To prevent an abortion in a case like that it’s the girl’s parents who need the lesson — on hypocrisy! I have heard an atheist rant and rave about when a fundamentalist family’s daughter got pregnant by an African-American guy, they “couldn’t get her to an abortionist fast enough.” I wonder how much of this goes on. Planned Parenthood says plenty of their abortions are performed on women who don’t believe in abortion but “just this once.”

    Another huge factor (from what I hear, again no scientific evidence) is older men with teen girls. I wish I did have statistics on how often it’s the same-age boyfriend vs. an older guy who’s the father. I think older men sometimes seek out teen girls precisely because the younger girls are less worldly-wise and less able to say “Wait a minute, I’m not endangering my future, if you cared about me you wouldn’t pressure me to.” Younger girls are more apt to buy the “Your mother doesn’t want you to date me (older guy) because she’s jealous, blah blah”

    Another factor is the age-old idea that if a girl or woman has birth control at the ready, she is not a “nice girl” because she “planned” to have sex. In order to maintain the image of innocence the girl must be “swept off her feet” not planning and not forearmed with birth control. I think there’s still a double standard or cultural imperative that a young woman act like she does not plan to have sex, and just got swept away or oops that margarita was stronger than expected.

    Hence the role of alcohol! I really thing a lot of the hookup culture and binge drinking is in part because people want to pretend they “just got swept away in the moment” not “calculated” so they have plausible deniability in the form of alcohol. They can say “I was drunk it doesn’t count.” I do not know what goes on in the guys’ heads except I suspect the guys think if the girl had X amount of alcohol she knew what she was doing and is fair game. My male boss says no, the guys are just using the opportunity. I think the girls get drunk so they can kind of have an “out” because there is so much judgment even though we live in a culture that pretends to try not to judge. Now we are judged if we are seen as having “planned” by being forearmed with birth control but if we were “accidentally” drunk and “things just happened” it’s like it didn’t count.

    Another factor is that as good as many birth control methods are, they are far from foolproof. Teen pregnancies went way down once Depo shots came along. The Pill is not foolproof, but the ways it can fail are in the fine print. The fine print is not explained when it is prescribed. If you take an antibiotic you can render the pill ineffective for the entire *month* and people don’t know that. If you take a pill at the wrong time of day and it’s the wrong day you can ovulate for that month. If you have diarrhea or throw up, you may not make the connection but you just lost your undissolved pill. Nevertheless, I think a lot of young women are not on the Pill or any birth control because that would seem “calculating” both to them and they think it would to the guy. Not sure. Not sure what percentage of young women who aren’t in a relationship and just dating around, are on the pill or any birth control but the percentage of married women who get pregnant on the pill is not zero, either. If the fine print about the ways the pill can fail were more known, this might prevent unwanted pregnancies.

    Another factor that I *never* hear talked about is the way dating has changed in the last 20 years. Instead of waiting to establish exclusivity and probably talk about birth control, couples are “expected” to have sex on the third date. I do not hear anyone combatting this idea but Mark Driscoll and his ilk. I do not like his theology but I will give him that–he addresses this issue head-on. However, I am not sure what this has to do with abortion because these people are probably out of college and probably ambitious and old enough to plan and use birth control without worrying if they look like they “planned” it or had to pretend “it just happened.” Again, no statistics, just trends out there in the culture that I never hear anyone but the full quiver set combat. Talk about gray and extremes–how bad is it when the only people who will question the “three date rule” are the Gothardites? How are our young women of today supposed to go against this expectation? It’s not just pressure from the guy–nowadays it’s pressure on whether you’re up to date, properly ambitious, smart, and whether you’re being a holdout because you’re all needy and clingy etc. I’d hate to be young and dating today!

    When I was a teen my mother showed me birth control and how to use it and I didn’t take it as permission to have sex. I knew what my mother meant though. “If you’re going to do it pleaaaase don’t get pregnant.” I could figure that out! People today seem to think people will take that as permission. I certainly didn’t. Is it better today that people use alcohol and “swept away” as permission?

    Just some thoughts. I think this kind of thing needs to be talked about. Ideally we should not have premarital sex but if we’re going to we should be honest enough moral agents that we know we’re going to and get birth control and not think it’s better to play “swept away!” oops pregnant! than to plan ahead, admit a weakness might happen, and know where the birth control is….just some thoughts.

24. cmohar | Apr 17, 2008 | Reply

    Well spoken Michael!

    Kudos to Adam for continuing this discussion.

    It is correct to characterize some pro-lifers’ approach to abortion as ineffective (not to mention offensive in some cases); however, Adam’s repeated assertion that the approach of “many” pro-lifers has been ineffective is inaccurate and unfair.

    Many pro-lifers go to great lengths to hate the sin but lover the sinner. We are the silent majority in the pro-life movement. You don’t see us on TV. We aren’t appreciated (or even acknowledged) for our efforts in your sermons for fear of offending those who are pro-choice Adam. And yet, we ARE effective at reducing abortions. According to statistics from the CDC’s website, abortions as a percentage of all pregnancies reached an all time high of 30.1% in 1981. Since then, the percentage of pregnancies ending in abortion has steadily DECREASED to 22.6% in 2005 (the latest year data is available). Admittedly, there is much more to be done, but it is misleading to suggest that the pro-life movement has been ineffective.

    It is noble to suggest ways to reduce abortions. Advocating situational (rather than absolute) morals and compromising the sanctity of life in order to appeal to the masses is not. What of William Wilberforce?

    I am quick to disagree with “most” ethicists who affirm the rights of the mother over the unborn. Is it not possible that this is a gray area, that the life of the mother is equal in value to the unborn’s? Shouldn’t we base our morals on scripture rather than secular ethics? While scriptures do not directly condemn abortion, the sanctity and value of unborn life seem quite clear. May I ask which scriptures you suggest for guidance about abortion?

    I get a kick out the semantics surrounding the notion that late term abortions are wrong but early term abortions are OK. Hmmm, let’s see…how shall we define late term? What month, week, day, hour, and second does “late term” start? How do you define the magic moment that signifies “late term”? It’s not possible to answer that one without being arbitrary and completely illogical. Guess that is a gray one, huh? I, for one, am willing to take a stand and say - in black and white - an abortion is an abortion is an abortion. If, in fact, most pro-choice advocates are against late term abortions, they are - by definition - against abortion, right? Gee, there is common ground!

    Finally, I take exception to the idea that black and white positions result in “more young people rejecting the church”. Studies have repeatedly shown that young people who are seekers are desperate for leaders who demonstrate moral clarity on tough issues. They crave guidance and direction based on scriptural principles. Young people who reject the church do so as a result of being indoctrinated into a culture that says “There is no higher authority, no right and wrong. How you feel is most important”. It is normal for young people to question their leaders and their faith - who among us has not chaffed under His yoke at some point? Allowing God’s grace to work upon young people’s hearts seems like a good solution. Removing all the black and white so everyone can feel good does not.

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1. From Adam Hamilton on Abortion « Matt Judkins | Apr 9, 2008

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